|Well, I've been through the medical mills, and with rather little to show for
The main takeaway lesson is to just scrap the "come on, it can't be that
hard" kind of rationalization in particular in connection with procrastination.
Drugs can push the thresholds around a bit and help getting over a temporary
deadlock, but they are also pushing personality in directions that were bad to
The only thing that works is playing with open cards. If you
don't interface with the rest of the world "as you should" and it turns out that
you can't effectively change that, remember that an interface consists of two
parts. And at least the part of the world that you daily interface with can be
involved in making things work.
The problem with a clinical diagnosis is
that it triggers the "pity mechanisms" where people stop having expectations
from you, turning you into inferior baggage. When indeed what is needed is the
will to check out different approaches to meeting or exceeding
I don't know the situation of your nephew. Whatever his
problems are, I don't think you can go wrong much by giving him enough leeway to
develop in directions that interest him. In today's amusement society,
it is rather easy to deadlock on entirely unproductive endeavors that don't add
to any skills you have.
Especially people with autistic traits, however, can
obsess about skills that are sought after, even if they can't tackle
tasks in a structured and plannable way.
I am currently letting myself be
paid (admittedly, rather badly) by other volunteers working on GNU LilyPond, a free software music
The initial "problem description" was posted in this article, and I had enough to offer here that so far, this appeal
worked out to the interest of all.
While the arrangement is likely to break
down/peter out, it does spell out one scenario where I was able to tell people
"I'll do whatever catches my fancy, and you pass me money with no strings
attached as long as you are satisfied with the results, no plans, no
It's not easy finding a employer willing to do that sort of deal,
of course. And obviously it will only work when this kind of haphazard work
ethics is compensated by an uncommon degree of skills, turning the arrangement
into a net win.
So be sure that you don't waste the entirety of your
nephew's time and energy on becoming "normal". The results will likely be
sub-par. And if he wants to compete in the real world, he will need to be
better at some things than others to make up for it. Be sure to leave breathing
room for that as well.
[ Reply to This | Parent | # ]